Monday, 23 March 2020

Best True Crime Podcasts to Self Isolate To.

Root of Evil. 

This is a list of long format (single case) true crime podcasts to listen to if you are self isolating/social distancing at the moment. As a disabled person who often has to spend long periods social distancing for physical and mental health reasons I thought I would share some of the podcasts I listen to.

I really like true crime podcasts, particularly single case one's, because they are so engrossing. Although they can be a bit intense when things are bad (and boy are they right now) after a while of trying happy distractions I find they lose their potency. After a while or constantly trying to bring your mood up it can become more tiring to maintain. Distraction via a well produced, thorough and intriguing podcast is the perfect antidote.


Root of Evil 


Root of Evil is an intense podcast to say the least. It is not for the faint of heart. Centring around the Hodel family, it explores horrific abuse, it's legacy and a very very compelling connection to one of the most shocking killings of all time. It is engrossing as hell and such a deep insight not only into a case but also a families attempts to survive and heal.


The Lady Vanishes 


The Lady Vanishes is an Australian true crime podcast and is probably one of my favourite of the past few years. It explored the case of Marion Barter, a teacher who went missing from Queensland in 1997. Her disappearance however was incredibly complex and it was initially believed she has left of her own free will. However, her daughters refusal to give up searching led to 7 News in Australia beginning an investigation into Marion and finding some truly bizarre details. 


Bear Brook

Bear Brook is an exploration of a very famous case that has intrigued the internet since the beginning of online true crime communities. In 1985 a barrel was found in Allenstown, New Hampshire containing two bodies but very little answers. In 2000, 15 years later, another barrel was found. That should be enough to get you hooked.


The Nighttime Podcast (Emma Fillipof is Missing)

The Nighttime Podcast by Jordan Bonaparte explores a number of different themes and cases each episode. However, a little while back, after covering the case of missing person Emma Fillipof, Bonaparte continued unravelling the case and created a separate feed for the episodes. The case of Emma Fillipof is a very interesting one with numerous theories regarding her whereabouts and possible demise.


In the Dark 

In the Dark focuses on a new case each season the first being the case of Jacob Wetterling, whose disappearance remained a mystery for 27 years and the second is the case of Curtis Flowers who has been incarcerated since 1996 for the shootings of four people and tried six times for the crime, believed to be the most in U.S history. The two cases are very different but the team at In the Dark do some great, detailed investigative work into both cases and is definitely for you if you like getting down to the finer details.


Missing & Murdered 

Missing and Murdered is a Canadian podcast that each season has focused on the case of a missing or murdered indigenous person. Although wildly underreported, there is a shockingly high rate of murdered indigenous women in Canada, and M&M not only does great investigative work into the case it features each season but also highlights and educates listeners on a long standing but ignored social travesty.  


The Teachers Pet 


The Teachers Pet is another Australian podcast that surrounds the case of Lynette Dawson, a missing women since 1982. Dawson's disappearance also intersects with institutional abuse, how abusers can hide in plain site and how systemic it can all be. If you like a really in-depth investigation that surrounds a case from all angles, The Teachers Pet is great. I don't want to give too much away but the podcast's investigation has been so successful that major headway is made. If you don't like spoilers don't google the case or read any summaries!


Let me know if you have any recommendations for me!

Take care! x






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Saturday, 22 February 2020

Best Vegan Food In Brighton (2020 Update)


As we are in 2020 now I thought I would do an updated list of the best places for Vegan food in Brighton. I eat out way too much. Completely unjustifiably. (Seriously, check out my instagram stories, my shame is all there) But it does mean I have a reasonably good gage on where is good!

So without delay or too much rambling here is the good stuff;


Pompoko


Chilli Tofu Don - Pompoko

Pompoko is amazing. I don't think a thing has changed in about the last 8 years I have been visiting here. Including the price. It's affordable with friendly and fast service. Not a great place for large groups of people as it is small and I don't think they take reservations, but worth a shot as they are always willing to accommodate. Personally I go for the tofu, which is cooked perfectly (crispy on the outside but soft within) but they also meat and an array of options so a good place to go with non-vegan/veggie friends. Would highly recommend getting the Yubamaki, as I've never had or seen anything else quite like it as well as the chilli tofu don pictured.




What the Pitta!


Vegan Kebab, What the Pitta!

Don't leave Brighton without trying What the Pitta! All vegan, they started out in London before coming to Brighton at the end of 2018 and I believe they now have a few more outlets in London. The bread is freshly made, doughy and soft, the salads and sauces are all really fresh and tasty but their mock kebab meat is truly something else. Even their fries are really good and they recently started doing chicken nuggets too. I never have enough room for everything but somehow I still always try.



Carlito Burrito




IMO Carlito Burrito does the best Mexican food in Brighton. It's somewhere I eat at/order from a lot and have done so for years, even back when it was a food truck, because it's so tasty. A lot of bold flavours that all blend perfectly, that are really fresh and even after probably eating too much, there is so much veg that I don't feel too bad. Vegan cheese is also available as on option on burritos as well as a vegan cheese quesadilla. They also make some of their own sauces, which are really good as well great different cocktails, particularly their variants on Margaritas, like the Hibiscus Margarita shown above. Bonus points also for their interior design, if you are in Brighton, very much worth a visit.



Beelzebab @ the Hope and Ruin


The Norm Dog, Beelzebab. 

Beelzebab, I believe, started doing vegan kebabs from a truck/stall but have grown a lot and now have a permanent kitchen at The Hope and Ruin. They now do hot dogs, loaded fries, vegan chicken kebabs, desserts. Great vegan junk food and once a month they hold a burger night and always have a hot dog of the month, making some truly unique creations. Check out their insta for a taste.
Also bonus points for being super near the train station, ideal for anyone visiting Brighton or just passing through.



Green Kitchen


Green Kitchen Meat Free Rashers

Green Kitchen is a great breakfast spot, serving classic British cafe food but veganised. They do a range of options but their fry up is really great and they make their own vegan bacon rashers. Which are so good in fact they are now sold in other shops in the local area, with a percentage of every sale going to The Retreat Animal Rescue, to help pigs live happy lives at their sanctuary.  

Purezza "The One With The Tomatoes" with Seitan Salami, Potatoes, Sundried Tomatoes & Olives.
Like What the Pitta! Purezza started out in London and made such good food they now have a few branches one of which we are lucky enough to have in Brighton. Purezza make excellent pizza's. They have a number of different bases inc. a GF base and are all vegan and their vegan cheese is homemade. They do some interesting choices but all of their basics are great and you can build your own. Definetly somewhere I take people visiting Brighton to show off Brighton vegan food.




Honorable Mention:


This place isn't eat in (as far as I know) so not ideal if you are just visiting Brighton for the day but if you are a resident, this place will satisfy your vegan chinese cravings. They do lots of great vegan options but are famous for their vegan chicken balls and vegan duck.


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Wednesday, 19 February 2020

How I Got Diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome



Like many with EDS, I didn't have a particularly easy journey to getting a diagnosis. EDS is a rare inherited disorder that affects connective tissue in the body, caused by different genetic defects in collagen. There are different subtypes of the condition but the most common and the one I personally have is Hypermobile EDS or hEDS. People with this type typically experience some of the following symptoms, 




I have experiences most of the issues listed above all of my life to a greater or lesser extent, as the disease is progressive they have steadily gotten worse as I have gotten older. However, due to a number of reasons my diagnosis did not come until only a few years ago.

I started showing symptoms that something was going on when I was a very young child and learning to walk. I had some minor issues that continued as I grew such as a slightly odd gait, constantly falling over and generally not being able to keep up physically with my peers. So I spent a number of years from ages 5-10 occasionally seeing consultants, who referred me to physiotherapists, who referred me to Orthotics for leg braces and splints. I think it was assumed that I would grow out of these issues as I got older and neither me not my family being the sort to make a fuss it was not a process that we pushed too much.

When I was about 11 after years of ducking and diving between different departments and consultants and a worsening of symptoms, as well as increased fatigue, I was sent to a neurologist and diagnosed with a different condition Charcot Marie Tooth disease. CMT is a disease that affects the nerves, ultimately causing muscle weakness and wastage. (More info here if you are curious) This felt like real progress. Even at a young age I was very aware that some people thought I was faking, or attention seeking or just generally did not take my concerns very seriously, especially a lot of doctors I saw.

However, it just didn't really fit with a lot of my symptoms. Some it explained perfectly, such as why my achilles tendon was so weak, an early sign of the disease, but many others were pretty anomalous. CMT is usually diagnosed in adults in middle age and for some one so young the symptoms should be very mild. For instance CMT also causes stiffness and rigidity in some joints, whereas I was the complete opposite, forever twisting my ankle or having my knees buckle and bend backwards. But the diagnosis is conclusive and easily proven via genetic testing and nerve conduction tests. So that was that. I had some minimal support such as adapted orthotics etc but as the disease is incurable it was all about management and getting on with it.

When I was around 13 my health, both physically and mentally took a pretty sharp nosedive. I had always experiences gastrointestinal issues but they quickly increased in intensity. My fatigue got much worse and I started vomiting uncontrollably. At first I assumed I had a virus but after a few weeks of throwing up everything I ate it became apparent something else was wrong. During this period of time my homelife was in an incredibly chaotic state and I had a lot of deeply stressful family issues going on. I had also had some anxiety issues all my life so it was assumed by consultants that this was simply stress, my fight or flight instinct was causing this and the problem was entirely phycological. This seemed pretty logical to me and my family so we didn't question this at all. But then it continued and continued. Months went by without it showing any signs of stopping. It was affecting me badly at school and making me quite weak in general. It also wasn't like normal sickness. It didn't hurt to be sick, I wouldn't gag or wretch at all it was just like swallowing in reverse.

After sometimes when we realised that this wasn't going to stop we went back to the sadly familiar rigmarole of being passed from doctor to doctor, department to department, hospital to hospital. After some minor investigations and medications when nothing was apparent, I was told yet again it was just psychological. This went on years. Over the years I learned to control the sickness a little better and just didn't eat for extended periods in order to manage it as best I could. But it never went away and no doctors ever really showed much concern that this was happening for such a long time. So, I learned to live with it. (Obviously that is a massive simplification, it led to a pretty bad eating disorder but that's another story)


Throughout my teens and early I kind of just managed all of these things, with the addition of increased joint pain, random injuries to my joints that happened with minimal impact, increasing gastrointestinal issues etc. I would sometimes see consultants that would indicate my issues were not consistent with CMT but no one would ever take action on these things. I had a diagnosis of CMT and that was that, really. But more and more it didn't make sense. A young person with CMT shouldn't be exhibiting these symptoms. The first person to really indicate to me that they believed something else was happening was a physiotherapist who specialised in Neuro-rehab. She pointed out the issues such as my joints being far to flexible in ways not consistent with CMT and started using terms such as hypermobility to me a lot.

I had already known of a few people with EDS and it was something that had come up during google searches of my symptoms, so when hyper-mobility came up it wasn't that surprising. My physio however was never exactly explicit. She seemed to be dropping pretty big hints about what she thought might be the issue without actually saying it. I felt like she was only a small step away from winking and nudging me, telling me to google it and look into it but was clearly didn't think it her place to say. When I would say I've brought these issues up to consultants before and been met with nothing more than a a shrug, she would look exasperated but never directly question them. This is something that was a big issue for me in getting diagnosed. No one would ever question anyone else directly. Sometimes, like this instance, physiotherapists, nurses, orthotics specialists, occupational therapists, would all seem dubious, but never willing to question consultants. Time and time again, I felt like there was something they wanted to say but never would and I could take guesses. I had guessed people were talking about EDS in the past, I was very aware of the condition but that didn't do me much good if the consultants were resistant.

So, you might be asking how did you actually get diagnosed. Well, a few years ago I started going to the National Hospital for Neurology and Neuroscience to be part of a study for my other condition, CMT. Being part of the study would really mean for me that I would be examined and tracked by some of the best experts in the world in that condition. My CMT isn't particularly severe although it does cause me many issues but the treatment under the NHNN is far superior to anywhere else, and helped a lot with things like orthotics etc and managing the condition. When my consultant started looking perplexed as to certain symptoms I had and the way my body moved, stating this was not at all consistent with CMT (and she would bloody know) she wrote to my GP to ask for him to refer me back to rheumatologists. Obviously this process takes months, sometimes it has taken over a year in the past but knowing that an expert finally took me seriously and took the time to examine me carefully and acknowledge these issues gave me to confidence to say 'Fuck it, I'm over this being polite shit' and push.

I love the NHS and we need to protect it at all costs but it was failing me big time. I really didn't have the money to but I went and saw a private rheumatologist. My thinking being that someone out of the NHS might not be bound my some weird concept of 'no one can question anyone else's diagnosis' and actually look at the facts. And they did. The doctor examined me, using the beighton score, did a medical history and looked at all my symptoms as a whole, joint, gastro etc. Within that first appointment he said that without a doubt I have this, I scored 9/9 on the hypermobility test and all of my other symptoms considered I very obviously have EDS. He didn't understand how this could have been missed for so long.

I only had one appointment with this doctor (couldn't afford any more) but was then referred to another NHS rheumatologist who concurred with his diagnosis. From there I was then referred to the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital (which is fantastic and if you have EDS and can get there, get there) to see specialists in EDS and they too agreed with the diagnosis. My consultant there actually chuckled when she examined me saying how apparent it was, she could tell immediately. She recommended me for a three week inpatient rehabilitation course which I should be attending at some point this year to try to help manage symptoms.

In its own way it's a happy ending. The sadness and humiliation I felt all those years being ignored or essentially told I was exaggerating hasn't ever gone away. I don't think it ever will really. I grew up with it and it has shaped me in ways I don't even fully know about. There is a sense of vindication in it, but still a lot of anger and sadness. If I had been taken a little more seriously early on, I could have managed or prevented symptoms from worsening and that is incredibly frustrating but in all honesty it pales in comparison to what it has done to me mentally.

To everyone out there that is or has been in a similar situation, because I know sadly there are plenty of you... fuck politeness. For years I held doctors in such high esteem, they know best, what do I know? I didn't want to push out of fear I would be seen as not only a hypochondriac but also as a pain in the arse. But they are only human. They make mistakes. There are so many amazing doctors out there that give there lives to helping people and some are just not on it, like any other sector of the populace.

Trust yourself. Advocate for yourself. You are not being a pain, you are IN pain. It is reasonable to expect reasonable help, respect and care.





Sources used:

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/ehlers-danlos-syndromes/
https://rarediseases.org/rare-diseases/ehlers-danlos-syndrome/
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/charcot-marie-tooth-disease/causes/
https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/assessing-joint-hypermobility/


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Sunday, 13 October 2019

Smoked Paprika Garlicky Stew

Sweet Potato Garlicky Stew.

Ingredients:

  • 2x Sweet Potatoes (or Butternut Squash if preferred)   
  • 1x Bulb of Garlic
  • 400g x Potatoes
  • 1 x Tsp Cumin
  • 2 Tbsp Paprika
  • 1 Tbsp Sweet/Spanish Paprika
  • 1 tsp Salt
  • 1 tin of Chopped Tomatos
  • 1 Stock cube (or equivalent)
  • 1x Onion
  • 2x Red Pepper
  • Spinach
  • 1 cup (ish) of Lemon Juice
  • 1 Packet Cherry Tomatos
  • 1 can of Chickpeas

Sweet Potato Roasted in Smoked Paprika 




















1. Begin by washing and peeling the sweet potatoes.

2. Then roast the vegetables in a pan with a little oil, salt, pepper, a generous amount of lemon juice, roughly a 1 tbsp of paprika, 1 tbsp of smoked paprika and about 5 cloves of garlic in the oven for around 40 minutes at 200 degrees. Throughout this time watch the garlic cloves are not burning, if so remove from the oven and set aside.


Cherry Tomatoes & Peppers Roasted in Smoked Paprika















3.Whilst the veg is roasting, chop a large onion and fry in a pan with around a tbsp of oil. 

4. Once the onions are beginning to go translucent add 3 cloves of crushed garlic and fry for around 30 seconds. 

5. Then add the remaining spices and a few good splashes of lemon juice. 

6. Add the roasted veg to the pan and coat them in the spices and onions.

7. Next add the tomatoes, the vegetable stock and the chickpeas and allow to simmer for around 20 minutes. 

All ingredients combined in pan.

8. Salt to taste and eat!!

Serves 5-6 people. I like to make it just for two and then know that I will have a lot of leftovers to freeze so on days when I am too tired to cook, I know I will have something nice waiting for me!


Leave a comment if you make this and let me know how it is!


:)

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Wednesday, 31 August 2016

Monty Bojangles 'Milky Mischief' Truffles.

Monty Bojangles Milky Mischief Truffles, Blogger, Review, Favourites
Monty Bojangles Milky Mischief Truffles
Recently, Monty Bojangles were kind enough to send me some of their Milk Chocolate 'Milky Mischief' Truffles to try and I was very excited! Although I absolutely love them, I don't tend to eat truffles very often. I always feel like they must be reserved for special occasions and eating them just on a Tuesday afternoon just because I wanted to, felt a little wrong. However... also very, very right.

As the name may indicate these are a really milky, light truffles. If you love really creamy, milky chocolate then these are for you. Being milk chocolate, they are a little sweeter, yet still manage to be really light, delicate and smooth. They also had really good mouthfeel (yes, its a horrible term, it is however correct). The outside was soft but still with a little bite and then the inside was really smooth. They melted perfectly as I sunk my teeth into them, solving all life's problems in one, delicious bite!

Monty Bojangles Milky Mischief Truffles Review, Blogger, Food Blogger
Monty Bojangles Milky Mischief Truffles
They also looked like proper truffles, handmade. Not all completely uniform and a little wonky here and there. I would however have liked them to be coated in a little more cocoa powder as they seemed a little sparse, however that is just preference.

Finally, the packaging was absolutely beautiful and felt really special! I feel like the packaging takes it from 'delicious truffles' to a really nice gift or treat for yourself. Sadly however, the box got pretty badly beaten up in transit so it was hard to get a picture that would have done it justice! I would like to point out that this isn't due to a packaging fault but an apparent addiction to stomping on my parcels my postman has developed! :|

Overall I really enjoyed the Monty Bojangles Milky Mischief Truffles and would definitely buy them again soon. At £3.50 they are actually really good value for money and would make a lovely little gift for friends and family. Available at Tesco now! :)

Take care!
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Friday, 19 August 2016

Micellar Waters: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly.

Left to Right: Garnier Micellar Water, Superfacialist Probiotic Micellar Cleansing Water & LO'real Skin Perfection Micellar Water.
I have been using Micellar Waters religiously for the past few years now. I was never one of the OG Bioderma Fans, importing from France but I have tried out my fair share. Here are 3 Micellar Waters that have made an impression on me, not all for good reasons. I think I will start with the 'good' and work my way down...

Garnier Skin Naturals Micellar Cleansing Water - This is definitely staple product for me. Firstly it is really gentle on both my skin and my eyes. I have fairly sensitive skin and suffer badly with acne but this stuff has never irritated my skin and has definitely helped keep it balanced oil wise. It also cleanses really well and I never have trouble removing cleansing my skin or removing makeup from my skin or from my eyes. It is also really well priced at around £4.99 (although often on sale) and lasts me a very long time. I tend to use the green cap for Combination and Sensitive Skin but also really like the original pink cap version. Overall I would highly recommend it and give it a 9/10.

LO'real Paris Skin Perfection Micellar Water - Now this is technically the 'bad' but it isn't terrible. It doesn't irritate my skin but I have noticed a few more breakouts whilst using it.  The morning after I sometimes find it hasn't removed all my makeup quite as well as it should and I suspect this is the reason. I find this extra annoying considering how fast I went through it. I found myself having to use much more than the Garnier micellar water in order to feel like my skin was clean. It did an okay job at removing my eye makeup, but again not as good as the Garnier. It is also the same price but at half the size, definitely not worth it. Overall I would probably give it about a 5/10.

Superfacialist Probiotic Micellar Cleansing Water - Now for the Ugly! I usually love the Superfacialist by Una Brennan products and their Rose Intense Moisture Mask is something I use a lot, so I was expecting great things from this micellar water. Sadly, I cannot use it. For some reason it burns my skin. I don't have any reaction to it, it doesn't even make my skin redder but it burns pretty badly and when I try to use it on my eyes it gets really bad. Again, no visible reaction, just pain. My skin is mildly sensitive, so this may contribute but my eyes are not so I have no idea why it hurts quite so badly. Despite perhaps sensibility I have come back to it a few times but it doesn't seem to get any better. Overall I give this stuff a 2/10 as it did do a good job at removing makeup but the burning is slightly hard to forgive!

Are you a Micellar Water fan? 

Let me know!
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Friday, 29 July 2016

Jessicurl Oil Blend for Softer Hair.

Jessicurl Oil Blend for Softer Hair Review, Oil Blend, Oil Treatment
Jessicurl Oil Blend for Softer Hair.
This stuff is amazing. I am probably far too enthusiastic about it and this probably isn't the best way to start a review but goddamn, I love it!

I have been using the Jessicurl Oil Blend for Softer Hair for about a month now and been frantically recommending it to everyone I know. My hair is in such good condition, really soft and shiny and the least frizzy it has ever been. It has become a firm staple in my haircare routine!

It is a blend of around 7 different oils, including Avocado, Coconut and Grapefruit. I am not sure what it is about the blend but it works. I use about 6 or 7 drops on wet hair after my leave in conditioner. Using my fingers or my Tangle Teezer to distribute it. Most days I don't even use a styling product with it as it doesn't need it anymore. It feels really nice to use and smells amazing.  Although I mostly use it on wet hair , I do sometimes use it on dry hair to smooth out any areas that need a bit of extra attention, usually just my ends. I think the most important thing about this product it that it has really improved the condition of my hair. Days when I don't use this product I still feel the benefits, it has definitely made it healthier!

The only downside is the bottle is a little small. However you only need a few drops and even for my very long hair that is enough. I am so glad that I found this stuff and cannot wait to try more Jessicurl products in the future. I would especially recommend it for anyone, curly hair or not with damaged hair or trouble with frizz. I wish I had this product years ago!

Have you tried any Jessicurl products?

Let me know!
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